My 29M wife 31F and I have been together since 21 and 23 and we have both mutually decided way before even discussing getting married that we don’t want kids and we still this way. However my wife’s sister is the opposite, very much family oriented wants to have a big family, I like kids and am fine looking after them for a day or two or being with them at family events but the idea of a lifelong commitment and responsibility is something I’m too selfish for as I want to travel and relax on weekends and when I’m old I want to enjoy peace and quiet so having kids doesn’t sound ideal to me.

My SIL has had trouble conceiving and have tried other options but they have had to resort to surrogacy and they have asked my wife to be there’s.

My wife has pretty much made up her mind that she is going to do it and I am vehemently against it. They haven’t gone through with anything yet and I have voiced that I’m against this to my wife a few times but she’s brushed me off each time and the last time said ‘you have no say in this matter it’s my body and if I choose to help my sister I will and you just have to suck it up’

After that I laid myself bare for her. I told her if she goes through with this I will not support her, I will not offer sympathy when she’s crying feeling fat and ugly, I will not be leaving at 12 midnight to go to the petrol station to get her something she might be craving. I said I would not clean up her sick or other fluids during and I would not be her birthing partner. She was crying by the end and tried to bring up the ‘in sickeness’ part of our vows but this isn’t sickness because as she said it’s her choice to help her sister. I’m standing firm on this but she’s locked me out our bedroom and is ingoring me, I just can’t help but feel lied to as I said I’m too selfish to deal with pregnancy and kids and she knew that and she’s disregarded all that because her sister can’t have kids but AITAH?