The title makes me sound like the asshole right out the gate but I need you to hear me out on this.

I (19F) am really close to my mom (50F) and love her and care about her well being very much- as is natural for any child to their parent. She's a lawyer, so our family makes good money. The thing with this is that she never gets to use any of the money she makes because she's paying MONTHLY for her leftover student loans from law school, my sister's (27F) student loans (my sister is a whole other story. tl;dr, she takes advantage of our mom financially and still lives with us even though she has a full-time job), my sister and father's phone's via. apple payment plan, the groceries, some of the bills (she splits some with our dad, I'm not sure which ones, but I know she pays more than our dad does), most of the streaming service subscriptions for the house, the wifi, and other payments ad. nauseum. This isn't even to mention her paying for things we (my younger brother [14M] and myself) need. Most recently, she's come into paying for her father (70 something M)'s nursing home. He's very sick and is dying. None of her siblings contribute to the funds for his care and costs of living even though they're all equally his children. Maybe they just don't feel the same sense of responsibility that she does?

That all being said, my mom- because we're close- confides in me a lot about her financial struggles and how they make her feel trapped. Like all she is is a bank and that she only spends the money she worked hard to make. (She worked her way out of childhood poverty, became a lawyer, and worked our family off of welfare into being upper middle class). She also mentions how she wishes she could spend more of her money on vacations, leisure, and on me and my brother. It makes me feel bad because I love her and don't want her to feel trapped. Often when I hear her on the phone with the nursing home people, or when she's talking to me about her finances and all the shit her dad needs to be taken care of, I find myself thinking "damn, I wish he was dead". NEVER ONCE HAVE I TOLD HER THAT I WISH HE WAS DEAD SO SHE COULD BE FREE! I would never say that to her. AM I WRONG FOR THINKING THIS WAY???? I want what's best for her, and I know that's her FATHER and that it would hurt her badly for him to pass- but her future and her present are being robbed of experiences that may let her indulge in HER HARD EARNED MONEY and the splendors of life due to everything she's paying for. Idk man. I feel so bad about this that I transferred out of an albeit expensive college and back to a school closer to home for that sweet, sweet cheap in state tuition so she can save her money and I can work to pay for school myself.

Am I the asshole?