I don’t know what to do anymore, whatever I do or say or beg for my mom just ends up moving everything. For some context, My mom is a complete neat-freak and a germaphobe. She hates it when the house is dirty and is constantly moving things around the house and supplies around as well.

It’s gotten to a point, Everyday we have to clean the house from the moment I get back from school and it has to be done in a specific way and look a specific way in order for my mom to be happy with it. Although yes, I do slack off sometimes I still consider myself to do more than the others (I cook, clean, do laundry, etc.) and on top of it I still have to do homework and study for my AP classes. I don’t really have time to play video games which I enjoy a lot since it’s one of the few things that helps me regulate my emotions and such.

So the only other thing I have that helps me with my overstimulation is drawing. I have ADHD and ASD. I get overstimulated extremely easily and have a lot of trouble with it, it’s something i’m working on.

So, back to what I wanted to say; My Mom recently changed my room completely and everything was organized in a certain way where I can easily access everything I need to help me regulate my emotions and physical self. It completely messed up my routine, In which it also resulted in my mom (most likely) throwing away my ONLY sketchbook I had. [My mom tends to throw away things that she believes have no worth]

My mom cleared my room of many, many things including some of my comfort plushies and I’ve been flipping my room inside out and currently am on the verge of a meltdown. I’ve asked her multiple times if she remembers seeing it or had misplaced it but she doesn’t remember and thinks she put it in my book bin. (I already checked it and it wasn’t in there) The thing is, I’ve asked specifically if she could leave all art supplies alone when she changes my room up so I can decide which ones i want to throw away.

There was this one time where she even threw away my $30 art supplies. Which was still very unused!! I usually pay with my own money from when I babysit my cousin or doggysit which is frequent. I feel like i’m overreacting, but at the same time I feel violated, so angry, and overstimulated. Art was a part of my life, it helped me function and her just it throwing away makes me want to just cry. I feel horrible for feeling this way, but I also feel just so tired of her constant doing.

Note: I can’t move out or do much since i’m still a minor and am very dependent on my parents.