I (22F) went to a club this weekend with my husband (22M) and 2 of his friends. The club we were at is pretty big. It has a large dance floor, 6 pool tables, 3 lanes for corn hole, 2 sections with tables, 2 large circle bars and 1 smaller bar that only serves beer. We were there this last Saturday night, so it was really busy, and I get a little anxious in crowds, so my husband held my hand everywhere we walked so that we didn’t get separated.

After sitting down for a drink, we went to the dance floor. My husband and I danced around with his friends for a little bit and a song came on that the bar had a line dance to. I didn’t know the dance, but my husband and his friends did, so I stepped off the dance floor and watched from the side while they danced. Not even a minute into standing there, a man started approaching me. I don’t really like talking to people I don’t know, let alone men, so when I saw this 6’7” behemoth heading my way, I simply walked somewhere else and continued watching my husband and his friends.

A while later his friends split up from us because their tinder dates had arrived, so we went over to play a few games of corn hole. After a game, my husband realized he had his friend’s vape in his pocket, so he ran the vape over to his friend while I set up for another game. When my husband stepped away, the same man walked over to me and asked if I wanted to play a game with him. I said that I had just finished playing, put the bean bags down on the board, and walked back over to my husband.

Later, my husband and I were dancing together again and a slow song came on. While we were slow dancing together, I saw the man out of the corner of my eye. He was standing just off the dance floor watching us. I mentioned that he kept approaching me and was watching us now to my husband, and he told me not worry about it. That he was just some desperate middle aged man, but if he bothered me again, he would say something. My husband and I wound up back at our table. I wasn’t drunk, but I had enough drinks to start feeling tipsy, so my husband went to the bar to grab me a water. As soon as he got up, the same man approached again. He tried to sit down, but I told him the seat was taken. He said “so is that guy your brother or what?” I didn’t look up at him, and just said “my husband.” He asked if I was serious and I didn’t respond. He then said “well, I don’t think he’d mind if I borrowed you for a sec.” And reached out to touch my hand. I pulled my hand away and glared up at him and said “even if he was fine with it, I’m not fine with smelling your sweaty back rolls. Go away.” The man looked offended, but scoffed and walked away.

When my husband came back, he had his friends with him. He said they were just saying bye to their dates and he waited by the door to show them where our table was. They sat down and I told them about the man and what he’d said. When the guy walked past again, my husband stood up and walked over to him. He (completely sober because he was the DD) said to the man “Hey dude, stop bothering my wife. You know she’s here with me and you made her uncomfortable.” The man told my husband “Whatever. She’s a bitch anyway.” My husband told him that it wasn’t a good idea to talk about people’s wives that way, and the man said “don’t waste your time defending an ugly cunt.” And my husband punched him. The guy swung to hit my husband back, and one of my husband’s friends (definitely drunk) ran up and punched the guy too. A bar tender asked us to leave, so we did.

Obviously the guy thought I was the asshole, but I’m also hearing that I was an asshole from one of the girls that met my husband’s friend at the bar. Husband’s friend told her the story, and she said it was a bitchy thing for me to say and I should’ve just walked away from him like I did the first 2 times and that I basically started the fight by saying something to my husband when “it wasn’t that big of a deal anyway.” I personally did think it was a big deal. It was clear my husband and I were there together. Like I said, he held my hand everywhere we walked, we played games together, sat together, danced together, and the man even watched us slow dance together before approaching me the third time. Clearly me walking away from him wasn’t getting the point that I was uninterested and uncomfortable across, and him disregarding that I said “my husband” and then trying to touch me really pissed me off. Maybe my choice of words was too far, but in my opinion, he deserved it. So, am I the asshole here?