As the title says...I am Sarah the gold-digger who went to her future in laws for Easter and started complaining about the prenup my future husband wanted me to sign and the unfair treatment towards my children. My ex future SIL made a post or a bunch of them and this is how I am now known, as a gold-digger. Thank you Nicole... but if anyone is interested to know the other side of the story, here it goes.

I met my ex partner two years ago during an event and we fell in love. The start of our relationship was amazing. He did not seem bothered by the fact that I had two kids from my previous marriage or that I was not as wealthy as him, we were just being happy. At first I aslo did not know the exact financial situation of his family. I knew he had money, I knew his family had money but I did not how much right from the start.

Fastforward and we are now dating for 1 year. We decide for him to meet my kids and I to meet his family. The kids like him and he likes them. My ex husband is ok with our kids having him in their lives but his only condition is that everyone knows their place. My boyfriend will only be my partner in our kids' eyes, not a third parent. This is the same that my partner wanted. He tells me that while he likes my children and all, he will never try to impose himself as a new parent. In my stupidity, I thought everything sounded fair. I did not want to be like all the other women who try to force the bio dad out of the picture or to force a relationship that is not there. I thought that as a mother I would not like my kids to recognize another woman as a mother so it seemed fair at that time.

I meet and start spending time with my partner's family, both alone and along with my kids. They are not bad people...but they are cold. The sister (Nicole), their parents, Nicole's partner are "cordial" as she put it, but that's it. Which again was not a problem at the time. I will say from the start that my kids were treated with kindness. Never once were they treated like an inconvenience or like they were not wanted there. It was even amazing to see Nicole going from a cold and calculated woman to being nice, open and joyfull with my kids. Looking back, I think their only doubts were always towards me, not my children. They never liked or trusted ME.

Life goes on and my partner and I start talking more about how our life together will be. I finally find out everything about their financial situation. My partner is not only well off, but he is involved in everything with his family. They have a family business, they have shared assets, they invest together and everything is kept in a very secured trust. Their entire family continue a legacy started some generations ago and it's a closed legacy, only meant to go to blood children, not spouses, not step children. Again I feel conflicted...as many people pointed out to Nicole's post, it makes me feel like I will always be an outsider but at the same time I also understand them in a way. But I look and compare myself to Nicole's partner. The same rules apply to him too but he is not bothered by it at all. So how would it make me look if I express any kind of concern?

The more I learn about their family dynamic, the more I start to understand their bevahiour and try to make excuses for them. I tried so hard to only see the good in them, thinking that maybe they are now the result of what their parents instilled in them. Both my ex partner and his sister are nice people but very transactional, his sister more. My ex would proudly talk about Nicole and what a business genius she is. Her mind works in a way to see opportunities and turn them into profit, he would say. She expanded the family business and made some very smart investments that those alone turned into a fortune. Which makes it make sense why she is so protective over her family assets and her brother to not be taken advantage of.

Overtime things start to affect me and I have no one to discuss my feelings with. This is where I was very stupid. I held everything in, I refused to express anything to my partner because I was affraid of him thinking badly of me. The only confident I could find was my cousin who ended up being the worst off all. During my discussions with my cousin, she keeps on telling me how it is not fair for me, how my kids deserve to fully be included in the family, how I need to fight for our rights. What Nicole did not mention in her post and what contributed a lot to me letting it all out during the Easter dinner, is the fact that before my partnert told me about the prenup we found out Nicole is pregnant and the family was extremely happy. My partner was so excited... he would talk all the time about his nephew, how he will play with him, buy him presents, how the little one is going the be the prince of the family. I was only focused on my partner's hapiness feeling like a slap because he was more excited for Nicole's kid than my own.

The prenup and inheritance topic. My partner told me that his lawyer suggested us to sign a prenup so that we have it all clear for when we get married. When I asked him what about my kdis, he told me my kids will not be included in his will. Basically they will never receive anything from the family inheritance, only our bio kids will but we can contribute together with their father to leave them something. In the event of us not having any children together, all his assets from the family legacy will go to Nicole as per what they agreed a long time ago. The same cousin who was my confident told me how unfair it was, how I have rights and I need to defend them.

In the end, everything I kept unsaid was too much and I exploded during the Easter dinner. This is all on me. I was stupid, I listened to my cousin, I allowed her to influence me and I messed up everything. If you are wondering why my cousin is the worst of all. It is because when she found out some days ago about Nicole's post, she turned on me and started showing to our family members what a gold digger I am. My parents are extremely disapointed in me saying they did not raise me to be entitled. My ex husband told me if I want so much to become rich I need to leave our kids out and not use them as tools and that he will never allow me to introduce our kids to my future victims. Other family members gossip on what a shame I bring to my parents. My partner broke up with me saying that I have shown everybody my true character . Reading through Nicole's replies to her post, I can see how she truly feels about me and I am sure their family will never accept me anymore.

So yes, this is my part. I know I was wrong and now I am paying for it. I know I was an AH and that I started turning into a gold digger. I never imagined that I will ever turn out like this but I guess I entered a world where I will never belong and it got to me. I am not trying to defend myself but parents with kids don't have any instructions when dating other people. I did not know how to act, what to do or how to think. I don't know what it's acceptable in a blended family or not. I never wanted to use my kids as tools but I understand I was wrong and I also understand why everyone is mad right now.