I (m21) have a friend called Vanessa (f20). We met at uni in fall 2023 as we became flatmates. We grew close really quickly. She was there for me when homesick, there to do shots with me, there to smoke Ciggies tgt. We were close. We went to Rome together in early 2024. We were close friends. she was my emergency contact at work and stuff and I trusted her so much she was like my sister. A bit of her backstory, she got kicked out at 18 by her crazy mother and has had to rely on herself for money ever since. Despite all this she’s a great hardworking person. Some Mistakes here and there but I always stood by her. In fall 2024, we still lived in the same building the year before, but in different flats. We saw each other often but still it was a bit less than I wanted. She always was a drinker and lover of sweet Mary Jane and smoked cigarettes at least once a day. In December of 2024. she started isolating herself from everyone. I’d text, she’d maybe not repsoend, she ghosted us for our new years plans, and we saw her less and less. That Christmas I had given her a £75 Eurostar gift card (the train that connects England with mainland Europe) hoping we could finally someday soon go to Paris or Amsterdam together. In 2025, I would text her and not get a response. If it was, it was the same thing of oh well I’m trying to not drink and smoke anymore. I don’t smoke weed, don’t drink as much as her, so it felt weird she gotta constantly remind me of it. I’m not the one who ever pushed her to drink or smoke more. I just hated that I would text my friend I thought I was so close with only to get no response. She just stays in her room all day and barely talks to anyone. She won’t explain it to me. It’s weird. As of April 2025. I said hey let’s catch up in a bit it’s been a while. No response. I saw her in our buildings smoking area a couple days ago (she’s back to cigarettes it seems) and I try talking to her and she’s icy and almost seems out of it. I know in my heart I did not doing anything wrong to upset her. But here’s my dilemma. I lowkey want my Eurostar gift card back. I gave it to her hoping we could do a trip together. But now she can’t be bothered to take 30 seconds out of her day to respond to my text. Or anyone’s for that matter. Ik it’s harsh but it just seems harsh on her end to ice out a close friend. Would I be The AH if I said hey I get that ur on ur own journey of self discovery or whatever but if you aren’t gonna use the gift I got for you and you are gonna ice me out, I want it back cuz I know I’ll actually use it. Help me broo.