I (22F) have a best friend “D” (21M) who has been in my life since we were ten. We grew up together and always dreamed of moving to the city, two hours out of our hometown, to my dad’s apartment building. We did it at 18 and have lived together since. My dad ended up fully moving in with us a year or so ago due to having to go back to work full time. My dad has always considered D a son, and D considers him his dad as well due to his bio father passing away when he was very young. My dad didn’t charge him rent for the first three years, now charges him 400$ a month.

I’ve always known D to lack empathy. When my first love died by suicide when I was 17 I texted D first, who said “good”. When a friend is going through a hard time he distances himself. A couple months back one of our at the time roommates had a mental breakdown and ended up inpatient for a week in a psychiatric facility. He was closer to her than I. I went to visit her many times, while he never did. He sent her one text after I pressured him.

On Thursday my uncle passed away by suicide. My dad I and left our apartment around 5am and I sent a text to D telling him the news and asking him to watch my cats for a couple days. He never responded. I ended up having my ex watch them instead. On Friday night, around 36 hours after the initial text, my dad became very angry. He had been texting D asking him to grab miscellaneous items from the apartment as he was coming to our hometown for the weekend to work. D never responded. At that point I had called D 10+ times to ask him to grab things, as well as to talk as I missed him and needed a friend to talk to. My dad ended up texting D, stating if he didn’t respond by the end of the night he would need to find somewhere else to live. My sister ended up reaching out to D and he did text back. He said he stopped taking his ADHD medication.

He reached out to my dad following this. My dad didn’t say what it was, but told me they would be having a very long discussion soon.

I’ve been very open with D, since the passing of my first love, that my biggest fear was someone around me committing suicide. I have diagnosed PTSD from it. My uncle and I were very close, D knew all of this. He has still not reached out.

I have no love for D anymore. I cannot fathom his behavior. I am disappointed and angry.

Would I be the asshole for ending our friendship here? I haven’t been home yet, and haven’t spoken to him yet. I don’t think I have enough energy left to fight. If he tries to apologize, which he never has, I’ll acknowledge it but will not accept it. I’m not sure how our friendship could end as we live together. I don’t want him to have to move out because he goes to school on the area, but I don’t want to see him. I’m just hurt.

Edit for more info