Throwaway for anonymity

I (23 NB) have been friends with “Elizabeth” (21 F) since I was 15. She’s my best friend and I can’t imagine my life without her in it. Unfortunately for me, I’ve found myself slowly falling in love with her for the past couple years, and I have no idea what to do about it. She’s so beautiful and kind and lights up every room she walks into. The issue is that I know she doesn’t feel the same way for me and I don’t want to risk our friendship by telling her how I feel. I’d rather stay friends than risk losing her. I don’t want to make her think that I’ve been using her or that the only reason I’m friends with her is to get with her. I’m worried she’ll hate me if I confess my feelings. I don’t think she knows how I feel and I don’t believe she feels the same. I’ve learned to live with the idea that we will never be together and I’m okay with that. I’d rather her be with someone who makes her happy because seeing her happy brightens my day.

My life is a million times better with her in it so the idea of losing her because of my love for her is so hard to think about. So I plan on just never telling her. I don’t plan to ever make any moves on her or keep her from relationships with anyone else. I want her to be happy even if that means being with someone else.

The thing is, I know she deserves to know that someone she’s so close with feels this way about her. I feel terrible that I’m keeping this from her. Her friendship just means everything to me and I don’t want it to change.

So, will I be an asshole if I never tell her how I feel to avoid ruining our friendship?

Also, sorry if my wording is all over the place. I’ve been battling with this for like 2 years and had to get my thoughts out.