Ok so I've been having problems with my mom for some time now and I'm starting to think I am the problem. Im a 16 year old boy and I will be turning 17 in a few months. When I was young my mom was diagnosed with breast cancer around the same time my grandmother had passed away. We really didn't have anyone else and my dad was distant so it was just the three of us. We never had a lot of money while I was growing up but anything I ever wanted my mom would try to get it for me. When I was having problems with other kids at school she found a way to get me into private school. In January of 2019 both me and my mom moved far away from any family support in order for her to find a new job. In the new town we moved to we both experienced racism of varying degrees. During that time I was going through a phase of trying to find who I was which didn't make it a whole lot better on my mom who was going through her health issues during that time. After nearly three years we moved back to where we were originally from with the help of church connections. There we found a new school for me which didn't last very long. Again but with the help of our church my mom got me in to private school. While at the private school I began to notice some racist things that the kids began doing there. Since I was going into highschool and my mom wanted to move to a more spacious house We decided to look for a nearby highschool. Fast forward to recently my Mom began to have more health issues that requires me to help her more often. I started to become more irritated with having to help her. I began not wanting to be bothered with her and would become irritated with her every time she would call my name to come help her. The more and more she would need my help the more tired of her I would become. At times when she would call me I would wait a few seconds before going to her because I would usually be relaxing. I would also become irritated at some of the things she would be asking me to do because I thought that they were absurd. She would start to tell others that we were close to how i didn't help her and that I was lazy. This would bug me as I thought I helped her a good amount. I began to think that maybe there was more that I could be doing for her. So I tried to help her as efficiently as I could by coming as soon as she calls me. But nothing really got any better. After some time we began to have little petty arguments about dumb stuff. And one day I was mad at her but she had asked me to pour her a glass of orange juice. But she then started to say absurd things such as I might try and put something in her drink. But I just let it go because what? Another time she had asked me to pull the string to her ceiling fan in order to turn it off but the string had accidentally slipped out of my hand and sprung back up into the fan blades and made a loud noise. So she had tried to hit me cause I guess she thought I did it on purpose. But I had blocked her by putting my hands up to protect myself. And she claimed that I had tried to hit her. She then kept antagonizing me by saying I was going to hit her and that if I did it would be the last thing I ever did. She would also accuse me of breaking stuff in the house that was either already broken or broke on their own. When we have arguments she claims that the devil is using me against her or that I'm full of negative energy. She says things like I'm going to kill her with the stress I'm putting on her and that I have no care for her. And she calls me out of me name. And sometimes I think that maybe I don't care about and how horrible I am for thinking such things. I let my anger get to me and I call her horrible name behind her back. I can even imagine how she must be feeling going through these health issues while being a single parent. As I'm writing this I think Im starting to realize that I'm the problem but I don't know how to change I want to be more caring for her and to help her out more but Im stopping myself because I think I want her to be the problem.